Saturday, October 23, 2010

Tomorrow? / Ugh....

Interesting title no? Well let me explain.
Lately i've been thinking a lot about how humans plan their activities and what is to happen each and every day. I'm just thinking, ya, well you can plan what you wanna plan, but we are NOT guaranteed tomorrow. Each day that i'm still alive, i'm thankful to God that HE GIVES me another chance to live. Today I was thinking about how each day is like a clean slate. We can start over again with God, ask forgiveness for our sins, and each day HE GIVES us another chance to live for Him. In some ways, I could just say "I'm gonna do this tomorrow" then it happens, but who am i to take that for granted? I should be ALWAYS thanking God for giving me another chance to live, another chance to start over with a clean slate, another chance for God's grace and forgiveness to come through to me, another chance_________ (fill in the blank). It's so easy for me to get caught up in my own plans, that sometimes i really miss WHO GIVES ME day after day after day after day.

On another note, ever have that feeling when you know you could be doing more with your life? I have. In fact, i've had this feeling for quite some time. There's tons of people/artists/christian actors/christian singers/ ie anyone else who really lives out the great commission everywhere they go- and I want sooo bad to be doing what they are doing- not literally the same thing, but ideally the same thing- preaching the gospel, praying for strength for the weary, freeing the captives, seeing people healed, bringing people to an understanding and TRUTH of who God is. I SO WANT to do this. But I feel that only wanting this, and not doing it is not ALL what God has for me. It is one thing to want to do something, it's another thing when I act on my thoughts and desires. Right now, I'm still in college; and i get jealous of others who are out there serving God with everything they have and completely being unashamed to share His word with others. I get jealous because I would love to be doing the same thing. But where am I? I'm still in college....UGH. It's not that i don't like college- i do- i even like my major (dance). But sometimes it's so hard for me to see that God actually has a plan for my life after college. Sure i can serve Him in college, sure i can be a light for Him on my college campus, sure i can do/be a lot of things, but that doesn't make college life go faster. It's possible that i can graduate in Fall 2011. It's possible that i can graduate in Spring of 2012. The sooner the better, right?

In light of all this, keep me in your prayers. Pray that God would begin to show me step-by-step of His master plan for my life. Pray that I will not lose the thought/truth that God really does have a plan for me. Why does he have a plan for me? Because He said so- and i really don't think that God is in the business of giving people pointless lives. Quite the opposite- he gives LIFE ABUNDANTLY. He is why my life is worth living.